Wrong Finger...

The time has come for Barry Bonds to say farewell to his teammates, thank the fans for watching him play and give a big middle finger wave to MLB while driving away from the ballpark for the last time. His being a target for the FBI (according to Jason “seriously, I was on steroids” Grimsley) and being leaked as a target for a grand jury (that now is setting its sights on Olympic sprinters and the track coach of the past decade instead of baseball players) is more than enough drama in this charade. I am not defending Barry Bonds or his cashing in his quality of life during the final 20 years for 209 homers in 4 years (200-2004, 52.25 a year). I am however holding Bud Selig and MLB just as culpable; indeed, they were his banker.

What truly irks me is that MLB is acting as if they had no idea that he (and potentially 50% of his coworkers across the continent) was/is doing steroids. What irks me even more is that they are not treating his breaking Babe Ruth’s (spiritual) record of 714 homers (has only happened once before in the past 71 years, not a big deal or anything) like anything special. Their handling of this whole situation is second ONLY to the United States government subsidizing (and still doing so btw) tobacco for over 200 years, airdropping cartons of cigarettes to our soldiers around the globe and then acting shocked when doctors tell them that smoking is bad for you and suing tobacco companies. To complete the act MLB need only sue Barry Bonds to reclaim his salary to be equally hypocritical.

Barry Bonds has made the San Francisco Giants and MLB an unbelievable amount of money over the past 6 years in particular but technically since 1986. That money acted as blinders for MLB, it allowed MLB to repress their ethics and not suspect players that showed up after four months off work 20-60 pounds heavier and jacked with muscles. For the better part of a decade, that we can reasonably be sure of, MLB ignored the fact that wiry players all of the sudden showed up to spring training looking like professional wrestlers. As Greg Maddux and Tom Glavine pointed out, “Chicks dig the long ball”. Not only do chicks dig them, but so do men, little boys that look up to players and everyone else that has a pulse and enjoys baseball on any level.

It was that love of the long ball that brought people to the stadiums to see players like Barry Bonds. Mark McGwire, Junior, Sammy Sosa, Rafael Palmiero, David Ortiz, Steve Balboni (although judging from his Ruthesque physique nobody dare accuse him of steroid use without looking like a McCarthy reincarnation) and countless other clean-up hitters and super studs like A-Rod, Tejada and Pujols have sold-out countless stadiums. In truth, we the consumers are as culpable as MLB is for the current situation in baseball. We are the ones that pay $8 a beer, $4.50 a hot dog and $3.50 a small soda after spending $45 on a ticket. If we did not give so much money to see the long balls fly MLB might have actually attempted to police itself before the Representative from California intervened.

I have heard people claim that were it not for steroids MLB would have died after the 1994 strike shortened seasoned. To this, I say bullshi#. Players like Junior and Cal Ripken brought people back because they showed up for work without pretense, without media spots and without a chip on their shoulder. Junior should have been quite pissed as he could have broken Maris’ record that year with the clip he was on before the strike. The chase four years later did not save baseball, Big Mac and Sammy clearly did not hurt baseball but they should not be credited with being saviors when players like Junior and Cal are more deserving. I enjoyed their race probably more than most being a fan of Big Mac since the `84 Olympics (he and Cory Snyder were frequently impersonated by me at the plate and on the diamond), but I cannot agree with those that crown him king.

Now, back to Barry. I have already explained that MLB deserves to get the finger from him for their ridiculous handling of steroids in general and him in particular. Let me give the best reason of all for him to walk away. Babe Ruth. He has surpassed THE legend of the game in home runs, he is in the record books and he is running on thin treads. He will not catch Hank, he can barely WALK let alone play solid defense. He is a shadow of his previous self (much like Ruth in a Braves uniform), he is hurting his team and he is going to leave an image in the minds of the fans that he does not deserve. He should walk away while he still can, literally and figuratively. I respect Barry Bonds as a baseball player, regardless of what he has or has not done off the field. I just wish he could have learned from Lyle Alzado what he gave up for those four glorious years of the long ball. I enjoyed them as much as the next person, but they only cost me $45 at most to see them. They are going to cost Barry a great deal more than that.